Module:Sandbox/Broedit

local p = {}

function p.tenSecondJokes(frame)
    local jokes = {
        "There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.",
        "Why do programmers wear glasses? Because they can't C#.",
        "An optimist says the glass is half full. A pessimist says it's half empty. An engineer says the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.",
        "A SQL query walks into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, 'Can I join you?'",
        "How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None, that's a hardware problem.",
        "Real programmer behavior: spending 6 hours trying to automate a 10-second task.",
        "Why did the computer go to the hospital? Because it had a virus!",
        "What is a programmer's favorite hangout place? The Foo Bar.",
        "Why do computer scientists prefer dark mode? Because light attracts bugs.",
        "How do you tell an introverted computer scientist from an extroverted one? The extroverted one looks at *your* shoes when talking to you.",
        "There are two hard things in computer science: cache invalidation, naming things, and off-by-one errors.",
        "A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it's not that good.",
        "Why did the developer break up with their keyboard? They just weren't clicking anymore.",
        "What do you call a programmer from Finland? Nerdic.",
        "Why do JavaScript developers love coffee? Because they are constantly dealing with a latte coffee script.",
        "What is a ghost's favorite file type? A .BOO file.",
        "Where do smart developers go to catch up on gossip? The source code.",
        "Why was the cell phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts.",
        "Why do programmers hate nature? It has too many bugs.",
        "What do computers eat for snack? Microchips.",
        "Why did the HTML coder get kicked out of the cinema? Because they forgot to close their tags.",
        "What's a programmer's favorite musical instrument? The synthesizer.",
        "Why did the function cross the road? To return a value.",
        "What is a computer's favorite beat? An algo-rhythm.",
        "Why did the developer go broke? Because they used up all their cache.",
        "What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.",
        "How do you organize a space party? You planet.",
        "Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.",
        "Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.",
        "What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.",
        "Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.",
        "Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts.",
        "What do you call a dinosaur that knows a lot of words? A thesaurus.",
        "Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.",
        "What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.",
        "Why are elevator jokes so good? They work on so many levels.",
        "What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.",
        "Why did the cookie go to the nurse? Because it felt crummy.",
        "What do you call a guy who's really into tech and tea? A computer-chai-ist.",
        "Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.",
        "What do you call a magic dog? A Labracadabrador.",
        "Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.",
        "What did one wall say to the other? I'll meet you at the corner.",
        "Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it's too far to walk.",
        "What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain.",
        "Why did the computer keep sneezing? It had too many open windows.",
        "What is an astronaut's favorite key on the keyboard? The space bar.",
        "Why did the programmer quit their job? They didn't get arrays.",
        "What do you call a computer that sings? A Dell.",
        "Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.",
        "How does a computer get drunk? It takes screenshots.",
        "What is the best way to catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut.",
        "Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe.",
        "What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.",
        "Why did the tree go to the dentist? To get a root canal.",
        "What do you call a cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.",
        "Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.",
        "What do you call a group of disorganized cats? A meowndry.",
        "Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed.",
        "What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore.",
        "Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.",
        "What do you call a sad cup of coffee? Depresso.",
        "Why do we tell actors to break a leg? Because every play has a cast.",
        "What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.",
        "Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All the fans left.",
        "What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.",
        "Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn't peeling well.",
        "What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.",
        "Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs.",
        "What do you call a fish without eyes? Fsh.",
        "Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.",
        "What do you call a shoe made of a banana? A slipper.",
        "Why did the web developer leave the room? They couldn't handle the table formatting.",
        "What do you call a paper airplane that can't fly? Stationary.",
        "Why did the computer go to sleep? Because it was tired of processing data.",
        "What do you call a pencil with two erasers? Pointless.",
        "Why did the man fall down the well? Because he couldn't see that well.",
        "What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant.",
        "Why did the duck cross the road? To prove he wasn't chicken.",
        "What do you call a cold dog? A chili dog.",
        "Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.",
        "What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts? A barber-queue.",
        "Why did the orange stop rolling? It ran out of juice.",
        "What do you call a musical insect? A hum-bug.",
        "Why did the light bulb fail the test? It wasn't very bright.",
        "What do you call a train carrying bubblegum? A chew-chew train.",
        "Why did the magnet go to court? It was charged with attraction.",
        "What do you call a map guide for spiders? The web site.",
        "Why did the clock get sent to the principal? It was tocking too much.",
        "What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud.",
        "Why did the computer run out of memory? It forgot where it parked its bytes.",
        "What do you call a monkey that loves chips? A chip-munk.",
        "Why did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt.",
        "What do you call a group of singing computers? A digital choir.",
        "Why did the cloud stay home? It was feeling under the weather.",
        "What do you call a ghost in a computer? A screensaver.",
        "Why did the square fail its driving test? It didn't turn around corners well.",
        "What do you call a fast computer? A sprint-er.",
        "Why did the router go to therapy? It lost its connection.",
        "Congratulations! You found joke number 100 on Broedit's profile!"
    }
    
   -- Function 2: Fixed Precise Hours Countdown
function p.checkStatus(frame)
    -- Read your account age in days (which can be a decimal behind the scenes)
    local daysOld = tonumber(frame.args[1]) or 0
    
    -- Autoconfirmed requires 4 days (which is exactly 96 hours)
    local totalHoursRequired = 96
    local hoursPassed = daysOld * 24
    
    if hoursPassed >= totalHoursRequired then
        return "CELEBRATE"
    else
        -- Calculate exact days and hours remaining
        local hoursLeft = totalHoursRequired - hoursPassed
        local daysLeft = math.floor(hoursLeft / 24)
        local extraHours = math.floor(hoursLeft % 24)
        
        if daysLeft > 0 then
            return daysLeft .. " days, " .. extraHours .. " hours"
        else
            return extraHours .. " hours"
        end
    end
  end
end


return p