Sologamy

Scene from the award-winning 2020 documentary Sologamy

Sologamy or autogamy is marriage by a person to themself. Critics argue that the practice is not legally binding, unlike traditional marriage.[1] whilst supporters of the practice argue that it affirms one's value[2] and leads to a happier life.[3][4]

An alternative term is self-marriage[5][6] or self-cest (selfcest), but this may also refer to a self-uniting marriage, which is a marriage without an officiant.[7]

Ceremonies

Ceremonies in a self-marriage may take almost the same form as that of a traditional marriage, which includes guests, a cake, and a reception.[8] Some self-marrying programs include giving guidance, practice, and support before the marriage.[9]

Self-marriage has become increasingly popular in the 21st century, especially among affluent women.[8][10] As of 2014, a travel agency in Kyoto is offering self-marriage packages for women, with some customers being wives who were dissatisfied with their original wedding.[11] Some media outlets also reported the self-marriage of a British photographer in 2014[12] and an Italian fitness trainer in 2017.[8][13] In June 2022, Kshama Bindu, an Indian woman from Gujarat, married herself, following all rituals and customs of a traditional Hindu wedding. This was noted as India's first sologamy.[14][15] She identified herself as bisexual and her reason for marrying herself is that she always wanted to be a bride but not a wife.[16]

In July 2023, the Italian visual artist Elena Ketra brought the digital performance ‘Sologamy.org‘ in an international preview in Rome, presented by the Fondazione Solares delle Arti.[17] For the first time, all the people could marry themselves online, entering their data to a touchscreen. Thet could also obtain a free certificate attesting to their sologamous marriage.

In fiction

Several television series have featured characters who married themselves. Those include Sue Sylvester in Glee,[18] Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and The City,[18] Holly Franklin in season 4 of The Exes, a middle-aged man in Jam,[19] The Red Guy in the episode "Comet!" of Cow and Chicken and Rona Jefferson in Doctors.[20] Valerie Pitman, also from Doctors, had a storyline that sees her marry herself.[21]

Sologamy is the subject of the award-winning 2010 British short comedy film The Man Who Married Himself, based on a short story by Charlie Fish that was first published in 1999.[22]

In the 2016 Ben Stiller movie Zoolander 2, the nonbinary model All (portrayed by Benedict Cumberbatch) is married to themself, as it is told that "monomarriage is finally legal in Italy".

The woman protagonist of Icíar Bollaín's 2020 movie Rosa's Wedding (La boda de Rosa).[23]

References

  1. ^ Goodall, Reece (23 October 2021). "Inside 'sologamywhile': the trend of marrying yourself". The Boar. Retrieved 3 August 2022.
  2. ^ DePaulo, Bella (September 14, 2017). "Beyond Self-Love: What Marrying Yourself is All About". Psychology Today. Retrieved 2017-12-25.
  3. ^ "About Self-Marriage". Self Marriage Ceremonies. Retrieved 2013-08-01.
  4. ^ Cagen, Sasha (2004). Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics. New York: HarperSanFrancisco. ISBN 9780060578985.
  5. ^ "Barodian set to marry herself: 24-year-old readies for rituals". Times of India. 2 June 2022. Retrieved 2 June 2022.
  6. ^ Cooper, Desiree. "Finding yourself in self-marriage." Detroit Free Press.
  7. ^ "General and detailed instructions for the bride, groom, and officant [sic] for completing the marriage license application and original certificate of marriage". Department of Health & Family Services, State of Wisconsin. Archived from the original on September 11, 2002.
  8. ^ a b c Tali, Didem (December 22, 2017). "Why growing numbers are saying 'yes' to themselves". BBC News.
  9. ^ "Self Marriage Ceremonies - Peace in our hearts. Peace in the world". Self Marriage Ceremonies. Retrieved 2016-03-09.
  10. ^ Burrows, Matt (October 6, 2017). "The ins and outs of marrying yourself". Newshub. New Zealand.
  11. ^ "Japan: 'Solo weddings' for single women". News from Elsewhere (blog). BBC News. December 22, 2014. Retrieved 2017-12-25.
  12. ^ Gelder, Grace; Cunard, Nick (October 4, 2014). "I married myself". The Guardian. Retrieved 2017-12-25.
  13. ^ Bort, Ryan (September 27, 2017). "What Is Self-Marriage? Italian Woman Weds Herself in Lavish Ceremony". Newsweek. Retrieved 2017-12-25.
  14. ^ "India's first 'sologamy' done with mehendi, haldi rituals as Gujarat woman marries herself". Gopi Maniar Ghanghar. India Today. 9 June 2022. Retrieved 9 June 2022.
  15. ^ "India's first sologamist Kshama Bindu marries herself, urges media to respect her privacy". The Economic Times . June 10, 2022.
  16. ^ Kritika, Bansal (Edited) (9 June 2022). "India's First Sologamy Marriage: Gujarat Woman Marries Herself With Full Taam Jhaam". India.com. Retrieved 11 June 2022. {{cite web}}: |first1= has generic name (help)
  17. ^ "Sologamy: grande successo dell'opera di Elena Ketra". Solares delle Arti (in Italian). Retrieved 2023-07-20.
  18. ^ a b Teeman, Tim (December 30, 2014). "Why Singles Should Say 'I Don't' to The Self-Marriage Movement". The Daily Beast. Retrieved 2017-12-25.
  19. ^ Peretti, Jacques (March 24, 2000). "Electric dreams". The Guardian. Retrieved 2008-06-24.
  20. ^ Writer: Kate Davidson; Director: Peter Fearon; Producer: Caroline Slater (19 November 2020). "All the Single Ladies". Doctors. BBC. BBC One.
  21. ^ Timblick, Simon. "'Doctors' spoilers: Does Valerie Pitman FINALLY get married?". What to Watch. (Future plc). Retrieved 14 December 2021.
  22. ^ "The Man Who Married Himself by Charlie Fish"". Archived from the original on 1999-10-11. Retrieved 2022-12-05.
  23. ^ "Icíar Bollaín: "Si tienes familia y trabajo, la última que tiene tiempo libre es la mujer"". 21 August 2020. Retrieved 2020-09-07.
  • The dictionary definition of sologamist at Wiktionary